Mary has taken Summer and Charlie to Ogunquit overnight. Jeff and I stood slack-jawed in the driveway, waving. We did not know what to do with ourselves. We figured we'd better go out for dinner. Funds, however, are light, what with the new manse. Then Jeff pulled a gift certificate to Serafina out of thin air. We'd bought it at the charity auction for the preschool over a year ago and I have no idea why it wasn't buried deeper in the desk piles. I mean, considering I can't find things like, my bright yellow Crocs, or our life-size stuffed Clifford the Big Red Dog.
I put on mascara.
The hostess seated us two tables away from Doris Kearns Goodwin. It was all I could do not to leap over the booth between us. When she got up to go to the ladies room, Jeff said "Now's your chance!" But it didn't seem appropriate to accost a Pulitzer-prize winning author in the loo and gush, "I just LOVED No Ordinary Time!" I considered sending her a cocktail, or perhaps a slice of chocolate cake, but in the end I chickened out. So Doris, if you're out there ego-surfing and you come upon my humble blog... I just LOVED No Ordinary Time! And Wait Till Next Year! And I haven't read your others but I am totally going to, I swear. Oh, and you look fantastic.
On the way home we passed the state police barracks and I said, rather lamely, "Massachusetts is a really long word," and then Jeff proceeded to count the letters in Massachusetts, North Carolina, South Carolina, Pennsylvania, California, North Dakota, South Dakota, and West Virginia, and conclude that with 13 letters, those first three are tied for the longest state names he could think of (except for the bogus Rhode Island and Providence Plantation). "So my statement was accurate," I said. "Massachusetts is a long word." Jeff agreed, but pointed out that it's not as long as Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg. "But that's in a different language," I complained. Jeff said, "Yeah--the same language as Massachusetts!"
"AH! You got me!" I cried.
And now you may be officially mortified that you know us.
P.S. I've been meaning to mention that I now know why Yo-Yo Ma carries his own cello on the plane. It's because it costs $2.5 million dollars!
rather than being mortified, i'm just reminded why i love you guys :-D
Posted by: shaina | August 17, 2008 at 11:02 PM
Sorry you were unable to parlay your being a literary colleague into somehow being able to share a handshake with Doris. Who was she dining with?
Posted by: joyce | August 18, 2008 at 07:27 AM
Right, right Mom. "I'm a writer too!" Doris was with six or seven people that we presumed to be family; we sneaked peaks at them to see if they were perhaps other people who regularly hang out with, oh, the Leader of the Free World and such, but they appeared to be regular folks.
Posted by: Jill | August 18, 2008 at 08:48 AM
Very funny post. I could totally imagine my Jeff and me having a similar conversation. I heard DKG give a speech at one of the Tufts commencements I attended. Can't remember which one. But your encounter was way cooler.
Posted by: Heather Z | August 19, 2008 at 06:20 PM
Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg? You have got to be kidding me! Spell check doesn't get it...
Posted by: | August 19, 2008 at 10:37 PM