Langer Loksh

Peggy Sez A+

Between the house and his job, Jeff seems to be doing the work of 10 men. He didn't get around to staining the porch steps until this morning, and then it started to rain. We tried blow drying the steps with Alicia's hair dryer--I already packed mine away since I hardly ever use it--but that didn't seem to be working. I ran to the hardware store and got some rubber stair treads and Jeff nailed them onto the steps.

We both worked all morning getting the house ready and then skedaddled for our first open house. Peggy called me right after 3:00 and said it was an A+ start. Everyone who came in said they thought it was great. Her husband came and wanted to know if we had placed the dust on the wine bottles in the basement to make it look like something out of the south of France. (?)

There were a couple of families with kids who liked the house but knew it would be too small; a dentist who was interested in making the house into an office; two single women, one of whom stayed for a long time; and a couple of forty-ish couples, one of which stayed for an hour and measured every room. "We're going to buy this house," they told Peggy. No offer yet. We're not holding our breath, but we're happy we're off to a good start.

Charming Home in Town with Best Schools For Sale

Per DS's comment below: If you know someone interested in my house, please email me at langerloksh@gmail.com and I'll send you the link. I have never posted any pics or address here b/c I fear the Internet psychos.

May 30: Always Big at Our House

Jeff fixed the dishwasher at 5:00 this morning. Which is why I married him--nine years ago today.

Summer turned six today. I visited her classroom and was subjected to a quiz about her. (Here she is with Mrs. McG.; Miss F. turned 30 and went to Vegas for a long weekend.) I think I got a C. I think she's lying when she says her favorite color is blue. She's trying to make me look bad in front of the kindergarteners. Also, as usual, I almost cried. One of the questions was "How many places have I lived?" And the answer, of course, is one--for another six weeks or so.

Summer then got to go up to the office and choose a trinket from the treasure chest. She brought her friend Jared with her. I happened to be there filling out a form, so I was able to snap her. She selected a hamburger-shaped keychain that oozes fake ketchup when you squeeze it. An obvious choice.

Tonight we all went out to dinner. Summer requested the Beacon Street Tavern in Brookline. We had to say no; we couldn't afford that much time in the car with our first open house tomorrow and the porch still an enormous filthy mess. But we admired her taste. We ate locally and now Jeff, Summer, and Charlie are watching Pirates of the Carribean and not cleaning the porch. It's OK, though. Somewhere out there is a cute couple from Somerville who will see through the grime and love this little house just like we did before we were even married.

Figuring it Out

Charlie: I Batman and you Spider-Man.

Me: OK, cool.

Charlie: No. I Spider-Man and you Mary Jane.

Me: RIGHT ON.

The Dishwasher Doesn't Know

that there's a For Sale sign on the front lawn. It doesn't know, and it doesn't care. It broke anyway, and there's standing water in it, and now I have nowhere to hide our clean underpants, because that's where Peggy said to hide the laundry. There or the freezer. And Jeff is working nine thousand hours a day, and when he gets home I have heavy things for him to move and I'm not going to ask him to get involved with the stupid fucking thousand dollar Bosch dishwasher that SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS. So I'm not cooking at all anymore. We're eating takeout on paper plates until this house is sold.

Boo!

When you sell your house there are certain things you are obligated to inform the buyers. If there has been a murder, or if there a ghost, you must disclose these facts. Peggy actually sold a house in Concord with a ghost. However, there is no need to tell buyers if there are creepy people next door.

World's Worst Homeowners

Jeff spent four days straight working on the yard, trimming trees, mulching, raking, and mowing. It looks fantastic. I decluttered the house and took bags and boxes over to Mary's house for storage. After a few frantic phone calls, we got Crazy Dave to come back on Tuesday; he has been working inside, painting, changing electrical outlets and light fixtures, and finishing up in the bathroom. While Charlie and I were at soccer, Jeff pulled out the hideous brass fireplace doors and shop-vac'd the fireplace. He cleaned the bricks with oven cleaner and now it looks like something out of Better Homes and Gardens. It took two hours. Why didn't we do this seven years ago? WHY ARE WE SO LAME? We are the biggest losers EVER.

Unfortunately the porch will not be ready for Summer's birthday party on Sunday. But the house is going on the market tomorrow, and I guess that's the important thing. And I'm beginning to think someone else might, just might, fall in love with it.

Annie, Rosie, and Angel Chillaxin' in the Coop

One-Eared Listener

MassHealth, which is like public assistance health insurance, would cover Charlie because he was born with a disability (his hearing loss). However, I think because we make too much money?, they would charge us $200.00 a month. So as far as I'm concerned we'd be better off putting the hearing aid (which costs $4,000) on a credit card. MassHealth says there is some sort of premium assistance plan, in which they would send us money (after we send them money) to help pay for our regular health insurance. But it's not a sure thing and it takes months to sort out, so I'm going to tell them to shove it.

My next step was to call the state's Commission for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing, because I'd heard they received a grant of $25,000 from the Shapiro Family Foundation to help families pay for hearing aids. The very nice lady at the commission informed me that that money was spent before it even arrived; there's currently a waiting list of 25 families looking for help paying for their kids' hearing aids.

Last week Charlie had his annual with the geneticist. There was nothing to report. We did discuss the hearing aid, and the geneticist felt that Charlie would probably just pull it off his head, and since he isn't in school yet, and his language is coming along fine, we don't have to drive ourselves insane trying to get the hearing aid. And I agree.

Apropos of Nothing

I'm cleaning my desk so we can show the house. I found a scrap of paper that says "Hub Grinding Service and Ken's Lounge Snacks." Jeff once called me from the road to tell me that he saw these words printed on a van. Reminded us of Tolman's Welding and House of Hurwitz, which is a joke shop inside a welding supply shop, and of course, the legendary Sully's Auto Repair and Billiards. And that place in Maine that has a sign that says Kayaks, Cheese.